FORMAL LETTER OF COMPLAINT: Dyes

[A Former User]

To my erstwhile and well meaning superiors-

DO YOU NOT KNOW WHO I AM?!

I am PHILLIP ROTSBANE, I have a lineage stretching 600 generations to the battle against Myth Drannor against the Rot God, I have the GENEROUS and PRINCIPLED Lord Theodora Rotsbane as my mother and you dare make me SOURCE my own dyes to be in compliance with your uniform?

I demand to be reimbursed the fifty gold coins, as a matter of principle, from purchasing these dyes, and that Adelaide be given a generous remuneration for her time modeling for me to ensure the correct dyes were purchased!

Sincerely,

Phillip Rotsbane

[Puffy]

Blueblood,

It saddens us to hear that the fifty gold weights upon you so heavily, that a little beggars gift could be such a burden on a man so noble. Whilst we seek reimbursement for you over the dyes, we would also wish to go over the missing wine bottles from the cellar which have not been properly declared.
[A very long list follows, running up a heavy price tag beyond the wages of a peasant farmhand]

Sincerely,
Blueblood Rallyhorn