Report delivered by Ben, to Etholycus

  • Project:

    The ultimate teapot.

    Threat level:

    Harmless, though it has a kill count of two thus far.

    Contribution if successful:

    Will keep the lead researcher of magical mental illnesses, lorekeeper, anthropologist, linguist and studious of the Divination school of magic Claeryss of House Kennyr’tryn... Happy, and energized during the day.

    Procedure thus far:

    The subject - a teapot sold cheaply at the supposedly ‘Kara-Turan goods’ market stall that sets up on Sundays downtown - was transmuted through the Baleful Polymorph spell utilizing seven Fire Beetle bellies as the main focus reagent, to withstand the temperature of Atticus Tea Permutation Upon Burning Hands #237 (a procedure I used to prepare my former mentor’s tea at temperatures he found acceptable). Later on it was transmuted with the same spell but using the legs of nine Phase Spiders so that it could phase through the kitchen door and serve tea in bed.

    The resulting transmutation was then animated with rudimentary enchantment of my own creation (#342: Alteration Upon Dominate Monster To Animate A Teapot To Serve Tea Autonomously), thus programmed to serve tea.

    Future procedures:

    Since the subject was wrongfully attacked, savaged and cracked by adventurers, it shall be now reinforced with a bulette carapace through a similar procedure to the one used to give it Fire Beetle belly insides and Phase Spider legs. It will also be give Wyvern wings for an optimal teatime experience.
    All of these transmutative processes will be overseen by my mentor Minister Etholycus Cabellan, master transmuter and inventor of both the arcane and the mechanical.

    Now, to make certain that the object does not somehow develop a sentience again through arcane mishap likely caused by a contamination of its transmutated qualities and the animation enchantment, a group of adventurers will go fight Wyverns, Phase Spiders, Fire Beetles and a Bulette while having a specific token in their person that I’ll enchant to absorb the psychic signature of their domination over these creatures, and later use as reagents for a new animation enchantment spell.

  • [There's a small note attached personally by Ben before he delivered it]

    It's sentient and hungry for Mythalite- You saw it